Forgive. Even when you don't want to. You have to. The End.

Hard couple of weeks.  I've been hurt to the point it feels like a death.  Words have been said that I am not sure can ever be recovered.  By both sides.   The most painful thing I have felt is my faith being questioned but I failed the test.  I let the words get to me and I lashed out.  In order to move forward,  I have to forgive all who spoke them.  Forgive myself for lashing out.  Forgive the anger in my heart.  Forgive the words I never even said because those words are just as bad as if the human ears had heard them or if my mouth had spoken them.  The heart is a funny thing.  When it is truly hurt and damaged it retreats to dark places, childlike places where every hurt we ever felt comes flooding back like a river of pins and needles and can make you feel so unloved and useless.  True hurt is sincerely like a death because it feels like we don't know if we can come back from it.

I prayed today with several people.  Here is what I know.  I can't hold on to hurt.  It is like hate.  It eats at you and nothing good comes from it.  I am telling you that if you are hurt by someone even if they are not sorry you have to let it go TODAY.   Not tomorrow, Not next week, ot next week.  TODAY.  It is like a cancer eating you and you will not and can not grow spiritually through Christ with it in you.  So, no matter who was right or wrong, it is your job to let it go today.   Release it.  Tell God you it release to him right now.  Tell him you are wrong for holding on to it.   You love him more than proving you are right or wrong in an argument.  Christ our Father must come above all and yes, that even means saying you are wrong if you feel you are not just to let it go!

It is unhealthy spiritually.  Our job is to put Him above all and we can't do that if we are going back and forth with people over things, that in the end are not going to matter anyway.

My life is at a uncertain point right now.  I don't know what tomorrow will bring.  Financially or anything.  But what I do know, Christ Jesus will be there.  No matter if I have to move.  He will make sure my kids are fed somehow.  I know my God will not let me or my family fall.  I believe and am speaking it into existence right now that a job will call me tomorrow.  I am speaking life into that my husband will not lose the medications he needs to live and the ones he needs.  I am speaking life into that every need my family needs will be met this week.  The bible promises me that every mountain I face shall be moved because I have the power to say to it be moved.   Well, I am telling you, I am speaking life into it and it shall be moved.  Mountains shall be moved and because I forgive and have been forgiven BIG things are going to move THIS week for my family.

I pray big things for you if you are facing things in your life too.  Remember, SPEAK IT!!  My grandma Susie always said, "Name it and Claim it baby".  Well, In Jesus name, this is your time, this is my time and in Jesus name, I name it and claim it!   Facing a mountain???  Where??   We are a child of God Almighty! You tell that mountain BE MOVED and it SHALL BE MOVED!!